Have you ever received a tiny critique and felt like your world was crumbling? Or maybe you overanalyze a text message wondering, Did I say something wrong? That’s rejection sensitivity at work—also known as Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD). It’s a fancy term for something that feels anything but fancy.
What Is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria?
RSD is the emotional equivalent of a bullhorn. A minor comment (or even the thought of rejection) can feel like a full-blown personal attack. If you have ADHD, this sensitivity can be heightened due to differences in how your brain processes emotions.
According to experts at ADDitude Magazine, RSD is one of the most common but misunderstood experiences for people with ADHD. You can read more about it here: https://www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd
How RSD Shows Up
- Emotional Overload: A perceived rejection can trigger feelings of despair, anger, or even shame that seem to come out of nowhere.
- Avoidance Behavior: You might steer clear of situations where rejection is even a possibility. (Yes, even skipping karaoke night to avoid a bad song review.)
- Self-Doubt: Persistent feelings of inadequacy or the belief that you’re “too much” for others to handle.
But here’s the thing—you’re not “too much.” Your brain is just processing emotions in a unique, over-the-top way.
What Can You Do?
Here are some ADHD-specific strategies to help you manage RSD without wanting to crawl under a blanket forever:
- Pause and Name It
- When emotions start to surge, take a deep breath and say, “This is my RSD talking.”
- Why it works: Naming your emotions helps you create distance from them, which makes them feel less overwhelming.
- Reframe the Situation
- Instead of assuming the worst, ask yourself, “What’s another explanation for what just happened?” For example, maybe your friend didn’t text back because they’re busy, not because they’re mad at you.
- Why it works: Challenging your initial thoughts helps your brain see a bigger picture.
- Find Your Cheerleaders
- Share your feelings with someone who gets it. Trusted friends, ADHD support groups, or even a funny meme buddy can help you see things in perspective.
- Why it works: Feeling understood lowers the emotional volume of rejection.
- Resource: Psychology Today article on ADHD and RSD: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-way-adhd/202106/adhd-and-rejection-sensitivity-dysphoria
A Quick Pep Talk
Here’s the truth: You are not your rejection sensitivity. You’re so much more— you are funny, creative, and resilient. The next time rejection hits like a tidal wave, remind yourself that this feeling is temporary and it’s okay to take a moment to recover.
Amy Harper